Two Jiu-Jitsu Complaints

Colton Smith put a beating on me yesterday, the likes of which I had not received in some time. Just when you think you’re near the top of the pecking order, you get reminded that there’s ALWAYS someone better. Jesus, I literally cannot imagine what it would be like if I had to worry about being struck. I’ll tell you this: there’d be a lot of blood – a lot of blood and a lot of crying, and probably a few screams. I woke up this morning feeling like I was involved in car crash.1

You're going to die up there

By ‘up there,’ Reagan actually meant ‘underneath him.’ I’d die as surely as the rest of the people on this season’s The Ultimate Fighter.

Complaint Number One:  I got beaten up yesterday.

What else, what else, what else?

The most important thing on my plate right now is training for the Pan-Ams. I’ve been exercising two or three times a day for the past ten days or so. I’ll release my training regimen after the tournament, but suffice it to say that it’s rigorous and I’m fucking exhausted all the time. I have to go running after this damn entry is finished.

I also purchased a fancy digital scale, one with the ability to measure my body fat percentage, total body water, muscle mass, bone mass. There are some problems associated with using an electric current (called Bio-Electrical Impedance Analysis, or BIA for short) to measure the aforementioned statistics, so I take measurements first thing in the morning to avoid the majority of them. They all cannot be avoided, of course. So I expect something along the order of 3-4% margin of error.2

What’s the verdict? 16.2% body fat (±~0.65%). At best, 15.55% body fat. At worst, 16.85%.

What does that look like?


Complaint Number Two:  I’m fat.

Yes, I’m ever-so-slightly fatter than the bastard at 15%. But I’m coming down. I have about ten pounds to lose before I’m on weight for the Pan Ams, and most of it is going to be fat. What’s the plan? To look like fucking Hercules when I step on the mats. Whether or not I succeed, I think, is a matter of grit and determination. Thank you, my audience. See you next Wednesday.


1. I’ve never been in a car crash before, but, from what I hear, it leaves you very sore. I have been in a bicycle crash! I feel like I was in a bicycle crash! Seriously. I’ve been walking around like a goddamn mummy all day.


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